Traversing from here to there and everywhere in between on the WWW, particularly the naughty parts (which, contrary to sexual snobgoblin twaddle, are busy little concourses of activity), there exists a fiction or myth or fantasy –I refuse to believe it is a reality– that most women are “size queens.”

Websites which cater to this particular “fetish” abound and somebody must be making money because there is a veritable plethora of raunch to sift through once you get to looking around.

Are there really hot wives in the real world? Certainly. Hot Wife Allie is certainly proof that they do, indeed, exist and seem to be having one heck of a good time. You go, Allie girl!

Are there really cuckolds? I can’t speak to that, but I sure do love the fantasy. Let me spell that out: F A N T A S Y ! In other words, I would not participate in such a relationship in my real life. I just think it screws with the heart, the spiritual part of us, a little too much to make for good relationship dynamics.

But hot wives or cuckolding or even black on white (interacial sex) are not necessarily terms that are synonymous with women preferring their men to be hung like horses. And if that were the case, a lot of men would be out of the running and many fine fucks down the tube.

As an erotic conversationalist (men do talk of such things) and as a female who has good female friendships (women do talk fo such things), my slant on this “big dick” thing, is that it is more a man’s fantasy than a woman’s.  I also speak from experience.

(Oh my! I’m about to get personal here, which is something I rarely do. So pull up a chair and perk up those ears.)

Some of you know that after a major heartbreak when I was in college I went through six months of what I call my “Slut Period.” I won’t bore you with all the details. (If you have me on the phone and ask nicely I might share a few juicy tidbits. Or then again, I might not. Or I might blog about it later. Who knows? You should know by now how I feel about boxes.) But I did have a fling or two with –shall we say– “larger than life” male types. And I found the experience less than satisfactory and quite uncomfortable.

Lesson: Large equipment does not guarantee that the operator knows how to use it.

But in the fantasy world…

Oh, yeah! Let’s make the fuck-stick large and the guy wielding it nasty!

Isabella Valentine has done it again!

Our little PhoneSex RockStar is offering Ringtones for your phone.

And they’re ABSOLUTELY FREE!

It’s no secret that Miss Valentine has one of the sexiest voices on the Net (and in your ear) today. She also happens to be high-shelf sexy, super-duper creative and very addicting. Just ask her guys. Or me. Or all the PSOs that want to grow up to be as good as her. This one is a no-brainer, guys. Get it while it’s (and you) are hot:

Hot Woman Ringtone – Download & Listen here

Erotic Hypnosis Ringtone – Download & Listen here

Slave Ringtone – Download & Listen here

Pantyboy Ringtone – Download & Listen here

***Isabella’s instructions: Right click mp3 and save to your computer. Then click here and upload the mp3 to your cell phone. Make sure your phone is compatible to accept music/voice tones and able to connect to the internet.

Once you hear Isabella’s voice, you are going to be hooked. You are going to want more, more and more of Isabella. But where to find it? How to get more? How will you get your Isabella fix?

Where else but Isabella’s Recordings? Where, I hasten to add, Isabella is currently offering a discount on her MP3s.

With seductive and enticing titles such as Bound and Helpless, Forced Cuckold and Bisexuality and Surrounded by Exotic Women, you cannot help but be a satisfied shopper.

So what are you waiting for? Get over there right now! She even has some free samples for you.

And you better not be coming back to me all fat and stupid.

In regards to my previous post, Get a Grip, I’ve gotten a bit of commentary here and there–some in agreement, others just not getting it and thinking I’m the devil’s own mistress. He should be so lucky.

Let me say this about that: Boxes are for shoes, not people.

And as an Erotic Conversationalist, what I bring to the table as a professional is not only the ability to be non-judgemental about a caller’s fantasies, but crackerjack support, empathy, and a whole lot of enthusiasm. That doesn’t mean that I am always capable of creating a particular fantasy.

After all, I’m only human. (You didn’t know that about me, did you?) But if I can’t work the particular brand of magic he is seeking, I can certainly make every effort to hook him up with a PSO that can.

Every caller is a customer, and customers deserve the same red carpet treatment that I want when I am spending my money with someone.

Let’s look at just a few fairly common fantasies:

• Twink: Twinks are young men/boys who are sexual boy-toys for older men. While I’ve had this request on many occasions, two constants applied in every single case: 1) The caller wanted to be the twink. 2) Every caller was middle-aged or even older.
• Castration: Admittedly, there are some voluntary eunuchs out there, but that is not what we are talking about. My callers have no real desire to be emascualted. In fact they are usually fucking up a storm in their every day lives. The business of being alpha males gets tedious after all! So a randy round of sexual annihilation is most satisfying.
• Erotic Humiliation: Just why in the heck would a man become sexually aroused at a woman telling him he is a worm, a loser, not good enough to fuck her with somebody else’s prick? Because he desires a powerful woman who can drive him to his knees. …for a while. And words are powerful, particularly when they’re the only tie that binds via the phone lines.

So do you really think these callers practice this stuff in their daily sexcapades? Do you really? Take it from me, 99.9% are living life just the same as you and me, maintaining the status quo and hopping from box to box (husband, boyfriend, lover, worker bee, sibling, cousin, friend, parent).

Let me spell it out, one more time:  It’s just   F – A – N – T – A – S – Y

When they get to me? The last thing I want to do is put them in a box.

The most elusive knowledge of all is self-knowledge.

~Mirra Komarovsky

…it’s just fantasy!

For me, as I’ve said many times before and will continue to say forever and a day, there is a big difference between fantasy and reality. Know what I mean, jelly bean?

I have a theory which goes something like this:

Most intelligent people have very wicked fantasies that have absolutely nothing to do with who they are in their everyday lives (including their sexual lives). It’s what gets them from here to there when they are masturbating. Some people are very good at forgetting the fantasy once they’ve reached “there,” never even thinking about that dark journey until the next time they are itching for some relief. It is a cycle that continues over and over. (The clinker is that because they are innocent in their minds, they are free to judge others.)

Anyway, that’s kind of the gist of it.

This is on my mind today because a PSO confided in me that a “pedophile” had called her. When she described the conversation, it was clear that this caller could not be labeled, by any stretch of the imagination (or her lack of imagination), as a child molester as his fantasy was about maternal domination. In other words, he was the child in his fantasies. Talk about mixing apples and oranges. Sigh. As Forrest’s mother told him, “Stupid is as stupid does.”

(Which reminds me of the time I described someone to my secretary as a “bigot.” Her eyes got real big and–I kid you not!–she said, “Oh my! How many wives does he have?”)

We can psychoanalyze fantasies from now until doomsday. The bottom line is that fantasies fulfill needs. We don’t need to know the Freudian explanation for each fetish and kink that comes along. The point is that they just aren’t about everyday living.

For example, many women (I am not one of them–so don’t even try it.) fantasize about being raped, but that doesn’t mean they want some greasy punk to pull a knife and abuse and violate them. The fantasy and the reality are two different animals.

Age play (as are most fantasies–in one way or another) is about the power exchange. It is a mind-fuck. Nothing more, nothing less.

Now go to bed and dream of electric sheep.

…in garter belts and stockings.

Also known as orgasm denial, cock control and a whole lot of other things (it’s more or less in the hands of the be-holder), this is a fetish/fantasy that has become quite popular. It happens to be one of my favorite fantasies, as it is a real life game I’ve played since I learned to walk and wiggle my hips. I mean, after all, what’s a good Catholic girl to do when she’s been taught to value her purity but enjoys the attention of smitten boys?

I might even go so far as to say that Tease and Denial is at the heart of all FemDom power exchanges. It’s as simple as this: We got it and men want it. God made it that way, which I think is pretty awesome. Keeps everything in balance and under control.  That would be, ahem, female control.

An important factor in considering this is that a desired fruit tastes twice as sweet when one puts off partaking of its nectar. Obviously, when it comes to sex, very few men have either the capability or foresight to delay gratification. Again, they really can’t help it; they’re wired that way. But, thanks to the lovely grace of femininity, the male animal can be taught. He might not like it, but he really has no other options.   To put it another way:  Good girls tease and good boys endure.

Chastity devices can be employed in worst/best (it’s your call) case scenarios. Some even fantasize about castration. And while it is a particularly fun fantasy (at least for me–oh how evil I can be when it is deserved), I wouldn’t recommend pursuing the fulfillment of that particular figment of illusion in any real-time situation. It would be bloody, painful and permanent. See what I mean about fantasy vs reality? Geeze!

A really great website for those interested in this particular "hobby" is Orgasm Denial, which is sort of a "hang out" for like-minded boys and girls. Although you have to create a member name to particpate, membership is free. And while there are a links to outside merchants and pay websites, David, who created and manages the site, has a lot of freebies available such as chatrooms, picture teases, blog capabilities, an internal mail system and much more. So put on your CB2000 and check it out!

xo, Angela