Just downright cranky today, so:

1. What fucking dummy decided to start putting tofu into egg drop soup?
2. Who told callers it is ok to start out your first call ever with a PSO with, “Tell me how you like that big, n***er dick, baby? (To which I always reply: “Why don’t you tell me how much you like it? Because isn’t that what we’re really talkling about here?” and/or “We will not be using racial slurs in this call.”) click
3. Who cares if other PSOs copy your stuff? Girls copy me all the time. So what? If the girl is so stupid that she can’t make up her own copy/design/etc., even if she gets a few callers who might have ended in your lap instead of hers, she isn’t going to be able to deliver the goods. So don’t sweat it.
4. Radio Shack customer service still sucks.
5. Come to think of it, so do their products.
   
6. Circuit City is on my shit-list now too. I will be writing about that soon. Stay tuned.
7. Why is it so hard to figure out that there is no way around it: Instant Karma is going to get you. So what is all this PSO snarky-narci-ness around the ‘net these days? Don’t we have better things to be doing with our time than ratting each other out? Fucking with someone else’s business is never, ever a good thing. And it will always hurt the fucker more than the fuckee.
8. Is there anything worse than a sub topping from the bottom? Like any of them could ever get away with it when they tangle with me. Block and Delete: Such awesome tools for the modern Mistress on the go.
9. Why oh why can’t I get my damn website updated? I have so many ideas, but they are all jumbled and I seem to be incapable of putting them into even some facsimile of coherency.
10. Hello out there, DeliaCD, the most beautiful crossdresser on the web. My version of the check is in mail: Stories coming…I swear!

So I just opened a fortune cookie: Reorganization is crucial at this time.

Lucky numbers: 5, 7, 13, 24, 30, 42.

So do I take the fortune to heart? Or do I go buy a bunch of lottery tickets? Or do I take two aspirin and call myself in the morning?

Helliphino!

But here is something to smile about. Even me, as cranky as I am.

For each correct answer you get five cents off per minute (i.e. 5 right anwers = 25 cents off per min. 10 right answers = 50 cents per minute). It’s my quiz, so I make the rules, but I’ve made this easy for you. Most of the answers can be easily found around this site. You can email me with your answers (eclecticpearl@yahoo.com).

1. What is the number one question men ask PSOs?
2. What do PSO’s usually call time-wasting men that have no intention of doing a call?
3. What is the name of my phone sex site? (it’s not zen fetish).
4. Isabella _____ (fill in the blank), specializes in panty boys and erotic hypnosis.
5. Mistress V’s favorite color is: a-pink b-red c-purple or d-black.
6. What does BDSM stand for?
7. Who is the dirtiest girl in the world?
8. True or False: Girl 73 is a Spike Lee movie about phone sex.
9. What is the name/url of the website at which I feature independant PSOs?
10. True or False: The Fantasy Factory is a book about phone sex.
11. What is the name/url of Princess Crissy’s website?
12. Which of the following can be a fetish? a-feathers b-balloons c-rubber d-diapers
13. True or False: Water Sports describes having sex in the ocean.
14. What is the name/url of my erotic story blog?
15. Who is the PSO at Stocking Affair?
16. Kali Siren lives where? a-Manhattan b-Seattle c-Tampa Bay d-Washington D.C.
17. What is the name/url of Doxy Wringer’s website?
18. Who would be a hot tease? a-CockSucker Sarah b-Bratty Princess c-Bitch from Hell d-Mommy Dearest
19. True or False: All phone sex callers are perverts.
20. How is my cat, Fredrick, different from other cats?

So…send those answer in and claim your “prize” by the end of the week.

xo

Isabella Valentine has done it again!

Our little PhoneSex RockStar is offering Ringtones for your phone.

And they’re ABSOLUTELY FREE!

It’s no secret that Miss Valentine has one of the sexiest voices on the Net (and in your ear) today. She also happens to be high-shelf sexy, super-duper creative and very addicting. Just ask her guys. Or me. Or all the PSOs that want to grow up to be as good as her. This one is a no-brainer, guys. Get it while it’s (and you) are hot:

Hot Woman Ringtone – Download & Listen here

Erotic Hypnosis Ringtone – Download & Listen here

Slave Ringtone – Download & Listen here

Pantyboy Ringtone – Download & Listen here

***Isabella’s instructions: Right click mp3 and save to your computer. Then click here and upload the mp3 to your cell phone. Make sure your phone is compatible to accept music/voice tones and able to connect to the internet.

Once you hear Isabella’s voice, you are going to be hooked. You are going to want more, more and more of Isabella. But where to find it? How to get more? How will you get your Isabella fix?

Where else but Isabella’s Recordings? Where, I hasten to add, Isabella is currently offering a discount on her MP3s.

With seductive and enticing titles such as Bound and Helpless, Forced Cuckold and Bisexuality and Surrounded by Exotic Women, you cannot help but be a satisfied shopper.

So what are you waiting for? Get over there right now! She even has some free samples for you.

And you better not be coming back to me all fat and stupid.

I just have to dish with you about Isabella Valentine.

So remember you heard it here first: Danger, Will Robinson! Girlishly flirtatious, erotically mesmerizing, shamefully addictive, sinfully sexy and wickedly beguiling, Ms. Valentine is BIG TROUBLE!

The kind of trouble I am talking about here is that Isabella is just too much of too many things: too smart, too creative, too talented, too sexy, too cute, too fun-loving, too positive, too kinky, and too good of a friend. Did I leave anything out? Well, let’s just say she is too much of a good thing and leave it at that. And you do know what they say about too much of a good thing, don’t you?

The fact is that if you are in the mood to get your phone freak on, Isabella is the girl that you should be looking up (when I’m nowhere to be found, of course). If you can’t tell by now, I simply adore this Fem Fatale.

Everything about her is first class, as is evidenced by her meticulously crafted website, which was a Vamp’s Pick at Jane’s Guide. Her daily journal (blog) is a favorite of mine, showcasing Ms. Valentine’s intelligence, creativity, passion for life, unceasing energy (artist, student, phonesex operator and much more) and generous spirit–and should be on everyone’s list of daily must-reads. I mean that! Go bookmark it right now.

Obviously, I happen to like Isabella bunches. I am lucky to count her among my friends, and I cherish that friendship deeply. She also happens to be an ethical and passionate business woman, which is why her callers adore her and phonesex operators look up to her.

Isabella makes the world a prettier place just by being in it. She’s so delightful, I could pinch her cheeks. And she’s so damn hot, sometimes I think about fucking her. And I’m straight! So that just shows you how powerfully charismatic she is.

Did I tell you that one of her specialties is Erotic Hypnosis? I don’t dare call her.

I just don’t dare.