At least I do.

When asked about my views on religion, I always say that I abhor religion, but love god. Does that make any sense? I am far from Mother Theresa or Gandhi. In fact, I am currently in the middle of a major spiritual deficit; and it doesn’t feel so very good, let me tell ya.

But when I’m doing it right for me, this is kinda-sorta how it goes:

1. I read daily from a (well-worn, heavily marked and dog-eared) meditation book, Each Day a New Beginning–a gift from Gregory, who you probably will hear about again–which, while geared to the feminine recovering alcoholic, makes a whole lot of sense to me. (Today’s [May 10] entry: To wait for someone else, or to expect someone else to make my life richer, or fuller or more satisfying, puts me in a constant state of suspension; and I miss all those moments that pass. They never come back to be experienced again. ~Kathleen Tierney Crilly)
2. I try to say only two personal prayers (basically because I think anything else is not a true belief in a higher power/intelligence). The first being Your will, not mine. And the second: Thank you.
3. The prayer of St. Francis is just the way I wish I lived my life everyday. I fall short most of the time. But I try to find my way back there when I start wobbling.
4. My other guide is Corinthians 13:4-8 (Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.) I try to remember this and live it. But, again, fall short.

I have many friends that are born-again Christians. They are always telling me, “Angela, God is gonna get ya.” To which I always respond, “He already has me. He just likes me better and says I don’t have to follow the rules.” Which, while said in jest, holds a whole lot of truth for me. Meaning, that I think we all get from here to there in our own special, unique way.

The journey is our life, our adventure–different for everybody. But we all end up at the same place. Which is exactly what I find so cool about this whole “spiritual thing.”

Isn’t it just fucking awesome?

***To someone very special: This entry is for you.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 10th, 2006 at 5:50 pm and is filed under Rhetorically Yours. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.