Well, you never know.  It just might help:

1. Don’t whisper.  We can’t hear you and what kind of conversation is that?
2. Identify yourself by more than your first name.  There are a lot of Johns and Marks and Toms, and even more than a few Brians and Martins.  (ie. Hi Angela, this is Fred in New York — the guy who has the black nylon fetish and likes cuckold fantasies.)
3. Rule of Thumb:  You should feel dirty during the call, but if you’re still feeling dirty after the call — well something just isn’t right.
4. Read up on a girl — check out her blog and/or website.  Know who you’re calling.  We like to know you are calling us purposely and not just randomly. 
5. Three way calls are usually a waste of your money.  You’re paying double (for the two of us) and it can be confusing and just not erotic at all.  A talented PSO can easily create a second girl (sometimes 4, 5 and even more girls — though the names start criss-crossing after a certain point) which will save wear and tear on your credit card.
6. Asking for discounted calls is just not cool.  Would you like it if your employer wanted to pay you less for the job you do?
7. Give us a rough outline of where you want to go.  Keep it short and simple.  Let us fill in the little details that will make your fantasy special and a unique new thing which we created together.
8. Always be a gentleman.  Say hello.  Exchange some civil chit chat.  That little bit of time getting comfortable will deeply enhance the intimacy you are looking for.
9. If your PSO is jealous because you call other girls, drop her.  We are your candy shop.  How dare she want you to keep your hands off all the goodies.
10. Sometimes things just don’t go well.  If you called her because you liked her profile, give her another chance.  It could make all the difference in the world.
11. Don’t ask to meet her.  Phone Sex is a business arrangement and not a dating service.
12. There’s nothing wrong with telling your PSO your time frame.  Some guys really only need ten minutes, others will talk for hours.  If we know ahead of time, we can pace the call.
13. Participation in the actual fantasy is up to you.  Some guys just want to listen.  Others want to take an active role.  Let your PSO know your preference.
14. If you like to play with toys while on a call, get yourself some headphones.  You’ll be glad you did.
15. Don’t send pictures of your dick as an introduction.  If you simply must, at least wait until you’ve gotten to know each other a little bit.
16. FYI:  If you do cocaine (or other uppers) and make calls, you will spend a lot of money.  PSOs love these calls.  You can’t get off, you need to talk, and it’s by the minute.  We make bank and you go broke.
17. Don’t show your face (on cam or via compromising pictures) to someone you just met on the phone.  Protect yourself and your loved ones.
18. Don’t make the mistake of comparing your significant other to your PSO.  We get paid to be sexy, to agree with you, to treat you like a king.  Do you think our boyfriends or husbands get this kind of treatment from us?  Nope.
19. Don’t hang up when you cum without saying goodbye.  It’s tacky.  And the nicer you are to us, the nicer we are to you.
20. Phone sex is an indulgence, your special treat to yourself.  You deserve it.  But don’t let it become an addiction or substitute for real relationships.  Because then it just isn’t any fun.

This entry was posted on Thursday, March 6th, 2008 at 12:06 am and is filed under And Another Thing, Kink-O-Phone. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.